Good Vs Bad

Week 5 – 1st Trimester

The hormones are soaring, boobs are hurting, vomit conversations have become the norm and her nose could pinpoint a gas leak from the next county. This shit is getting real…

7 rather difficult days… The SO is quite the character, powerful, funny, impatient, demanding and eternally kind to name a few but, nevertheless as a woman she still has her reservations and I take pride in reassuring any doubt she may have before she might have them. I believe it’s healthy, to honestly tell her, that she’s beautiful before she doubts herself. Let her know she’s stronger than the both of us when I can see she feels weak and tell her how much she truly is loved.

All of these scenarios differ upon the circumstantial situations and I will only be honest with her in the hope that our relationship will thrive.

Whilst genuinely trying to understand her physical changes and the pain that comes with it I’m intrigued how she feels to not only empathise but to see if there is actually something that I could do to help or to ease her discomfort. Additionally, I’d like to encourage that she may be carrying the baby but she isn’t alone on this journey.

But…

Does she hear when noise exits my face?

Are the mood swings getting in the way?

If a brick was close by would she throw it, hard, at me?

Is my existence relevant?

I ask myself these questions at least 86,400 times a day

Whilst the psychological impact can be weary & it’s bloody difficult to anticipate her mood, dodge the hormone bullet, maintain sanity and not have a sodding clue what she’s going through.

My god it’s worth it.

Last night after dinner, she turned to me looking incredibly upset and apologised for having mood swings.

My heart sank.

The woman is throwing up everything that passes her lips, daily disagreeing with every bra ever manufactured, can’t manage more than 3 hours of continual sleep PLUS there’s something growing inside her.

I want to rip out my ovaries on a monthly basis and she is going through that. Every. Single. Minute.

She can’t take anything for it. Can’t drink to relax. And she’s apologising for having a mood swing.

Girl… you’re entitled